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Thursday, March 2, 2017

Bullying

It has come to my attention that not only do kids get bullied at school but so do teachers. Yes, you heard me correctly. Teachers are bullied. They, teachers, give so much of themselves to teach children to get a good education, to get their dreams started, to build characters that one day will be a great success later in life. They even go above and beyond just teaching. They give positive feedback, they help build their students to be their best, to DO their best, they make sure they have supplies, which they buy themselves. Do they have too? No. They do it because they care.  So where does the bullying come into play if this is how they treat their students?

There are some, not many, but some who, for whatever reason, need a lot of attention. They crave it and when they don't get the fix right away, they make bad choices. It's trying, especially when you have 29 other students to deal with.

I have dealt with many students, in varying ranges in behavior and disabilities. It has been stressful, so stressful that a few years ago after school had let out for summer vacation, I broke out with huge, itchy, welts all over my body...stress. There were other times where I had to have a walkie talkie with me at all times when I worked with one student because you'd never know when he would have a meltdown. Yes, I have been threatened.

I have left that school and I find myself in yet another school, but this one is different in so many ways. I love the teachers, more so than I did at my other school. They genuinely care, appreciate everything you do for them. It's been a great experience. The thing that is new for me is being bullied.

I am a forgiving person, I may get mad when pushed to my limits, but in seconds I will forgive that person and help them out as best as I can, but...

I have found good in a lot of students who are making bad choices, but have come to me for help and have behaved beautifully towards me and for them I am grateful. There is one who I have tried my best to see the good in him and still do, but it has gotten to the point where he is harassing me and talking about me in the classroom. It's done in front of me, smiling and laughing the whole time. He calls out my name and laughs when I come over to help him or so I thought, and starts to whisper to another student as he is looking at me. Oh, I know it's about me because I can hear him mention my name.

I've never in my 13+ years of being a paraprofessional, have come across a student who blatantly taunts me. I choose not to listen and ignore him, for I feel that if he can't respect me, why should I make the effort to help him. I know that sounds awful, not helping a student, but I can't and won't.
It's a two-way street, you respect me and I  will do the same.

I'm at my wit's end and I'm frustrated to the point where I wish to leave the school and go somewhere else. I can't deal with it anymore, but better judgment says, "no." I keep telling myself just four more years, four more then I can quit. Besides, he has one more year and he's off to High School. I CAN DO THIS.